Also it appears that the Yuel Log is actually evil. I thought the other guy was Christ, I'm confused. We get a weirdo scene of Serah being hung on an invisible crucifix while crying blood. Now things start to make even less sense. Usually I'd wonder how this is possible, but FFXIII-2 is filled with so much timey-whimey time travel bullshit that Toriyama could come up with any kind of excuse so who cares? Lightning fights Caius, she wins a few times, but Caius, as we already know, is ridiculously overpowered so he just haxxors her into the ground and declares victory. This is apparently happening at the same time that Serah and whats-his-name are fighting Caius in the real world.
I still don't know what SE was thinking on that one.Īnyway, in this DLC, Lightning is fighting Captain Broken, Caius, in Valhalla.
So there we go, we're right back to the beginning with this: nobody ever wanted to play as Serah or that other guy. This makes me unhappy since if Lightning was playable from the beginning this game would have been a lot more fun. Not only that, but she has her own deck of Job Classes entirely exclusive to her, which sounds like an interesting game mechanic, but its ultimately wasted on two boss fights. Now, fully-playable Lightning is actually quite impressive, her abilities and stats are many times stronger than anything you'd be capable of in the main game, and she's fighting on her own. For the rest of the game, as we all know, you play as Serah and that other guy**.
#EPHEMERAL MEMORIES DLC FULL#
So ultimately, Lighting gets roughly ten minutes of full playtime. "Requiem of the Pretentious" stars a fully-playable Lightning, the character that's supposed to be the hero of this game and the character on the cover. Also, let me begin by saying this: Motomu Toriyama, please retire. So let me do a brief post explaining why this new DLC is horrible. All in all, FFXIII-2 in its complete form adds up to something like one hundred dollars, assuming you bought it new. So if you spent six bucks on this bullshit (like I didn't*) you were left just as unsatisfied as ever, perhaps even more so. And guess what? This ending is just as horrible and inconclusive as anything else. But this last DLC, "Requiem of a Pretentious" is actually the very last event to occur in this game, so its the closest thing to an ending we may ever get. You got a battle against some old Final Fantasy veterans like Ultros and Gilgamesh, a fight against Lightning in her original costume, a really stupid Sazh-based poker game, and costumes, lots and lots of costumes. So far most of the DLC has been rather harmless. This, as far as I know, is actually going to be the very last thing released for the entire FFXIII saga, barring of course the seemingly inevitable FFXIII-3. Ultimately I had no choice but to once again return to the sordid tale of FFXIII, because just this week, Square Enix released the last bit of DLC for the game. Preferably clear unambiguous endings where the heroes succeed and you're left with the warm knowledge that you didn't waste thirty hours playing some lazy half-assed piece of shit developed by cynical bastards who stopped giving a shit about their flagship RPG franchise seven years ago. And as we all equally should know, all video games need to have endings. As we all know, FFXIII-2 does not have an ending. Mostly in the now-clearly delusional hope that one of those DLC items would happen to contain the real ending of the game. Ever since my experience with Motomu Toriyama's latest unspeakable catastrophe, I've found myself increasingly morbidly fascinated by the slow trickle of DLC stuff. If you recall my response to that game, I hated it so much that even three months later I still refer to it as a "wretched abomination of a game". So it has now been three months since I've played that wretched abomination of a game called " Final Fantasy XIII-2: The Legend of Curly's Gold". Here's that post where I complain about trends in Final Fantasy! *thumbs up*
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